Translanticism (almost)

Is college what you expect it to be? Is it everything you wanted?
I’m not even sure who I am anymore.
I wanted to run away and escape so bad.
I wanted change, but not complete change.
I didn’t expect to feel for you this way, at the end of the summer.
I don’t know what I expected.
I’m not used to all this unfamiliarity.
I mean I like how there’s lots to do in this big city.
But, I prefer doing nothing with you in our little city.
Seems like the more I discover here, the less I know about myself.
I’m scared I’m going to lose everything I had.
Or, maybe just you.
The only thing I can do is wait, anxiously.
Let time pass by and watch life happen.
Why is it so hard to get used to these new people?
Am I ever going to form stable relationships?
All these new rules, new responsibilities.
If we’re on our own, then let us make our own mistakes.
Our way.
But like I said, I’m scared.
At least I have a stable place to sleep.
I’m not sure, its going to feel the same.
Or even like a home.
We’re together, but we’re alone.
Promise me we’ll all be okay.
& if you can’t promise, lie to me anyway.
Nobody said it was easy.
No one ever said it would be. this. hard.